honesty vs professionalism
     Supposely I made a mistake back then (minor one) and then I decided to correct it and make the right decision and be honest with it, like face it...but what did it feels bad? I mean, does correcting my own previous mistake get myself slammed with self-consciousness and lack of professionalism at work? I thought I'll feel better once I get over with it but despite coming clean and upright, it just felt really bad. I knew I did the right thing but why does it feel so bad? What's my fear? Now here's my insecurity.

     I learned some little things about work from my previous experiences, sometimes honesty really isn't the best policy. A number of people prefer to hide their mistakes than to face it but I think I usually throw myself on the frontline and just face it, and sometimes it feels kinda bad but lying is as bad.

     Anyway, my dad and I weren't in good terms when it comes to my education these days...there are talks about loans and stuffs and where I wanted to go next and all that. *sigh* I really want it to be over. I mean, I really hate these discussions where there are no absolute ending. I wanted to get out of this place but he preferred me to stay here but it's pretty limited in this town where I'm living. There aren't many choices. I did have some places I intended to go to but apparently, none of them are located anyway near where I am right now. Can it be better soon?

     I really wanted to go through school-life here entirely because I love this place but as far as my education is concerned, everything is kinda limited, I hate being dumped into situation where people haven't heard of my school, I got really pissed of at times and the situation here wasn't exactly what I had imagined back then.

Stay...or not stay?

     I kept getting my head crashed by thoughts that I might have to follow where things lead me to, for the better and then there are so many memories and so many things I know that I'm gonna miss...my family especially...and a guy I probably had a crush on (the usual stuff), who probably wouldn't leave this place since he was working here. I'm not sure about the latter cuz I haven't got to know him enough. Where did he go, anyway?

     Saw Tgihaco today, too. Some schoolgirls stopped him just behind me the other day when he was walking pass. They kept calling him (weird girls, huh?) and said that they want to take a picture of him, for their school project. He asked if it was true and they kept convincing that they were not lying. He ended up excusing himself and left. What a guy. At least he didn't let the girls get his picture so easily.

     Man, when was the day I had a crush on Tgihaco, again? Wait, I started working there in May, went to that branch somewhere in June 2003...whoa, man, that was, like, about 9 months...and we haven't spoken even a single word to one another. That must be the second longest non-talking crush I ever had (the first was this guy I admired when I was 11 while my longest crush-term ever was on a guy I quarrelled on the first day we met, yeah, believe it)...a woman who was pregnant the time when I had a crush on Tgihaco had probably given birth to a cute baby boy *lol*.

Dumb Question To Ponder (DQTP): "Why do wedding cards always have to smell so good?"
.: posted by Francisca @ 9:38 PM

 
Chocolate [K]razy
     I'm not sure about my appetite today, it's one of those weird ones...yesterday, I couldn't hold myself from chocolate+vanilla ice-cream, and today I was drawn and theoritically flying towards the chocolate corner at the supermarket.

     It's weird, I mean, I was walking back and forth at that particular row and looked for chocolates. Saw the delicious Cadbury. No way, not getting another Cadbury, I need something...not Kit Kat. Kit Kat's too little, I mean, I can practically eat it all in one second. Finally...I found Tim Tam...I don't remember eating one of those. Maybe I had but it must have been quite a while. The next thing I know, two packets of Tim Tam went all the way to the counter.

     Then, I was enjoying the delicious chocolate biscuits and it all went well until...I looked into the back of the CD (the reflective part) and saw...erm, why is my teeth filled with chocolate. Then, I swallowed a quarter litre of water but they're still there.

     My next trip to the shop...chewing gum!

     Enough about chocolate cuz I want to save the fun for later...I'm hungry right now and when I'm hungry, I'm an aggressive shopper (what a word). I can practically take anything on the supermarket's shelf...okay, not going there later or I'll end up really broke *lol*.

.: posted by Francisca @ 5:17 PM